Watney Heckbulb Uhhhnn

You do it. Get it now. No, you do it, it’s over there.

To kick us off, I’d like to state that I’m not a particularly big advocate of the coat. Which I know sounds weird. Personally, for warmth I opt for the layers plus hoodie method. My general thinking being: if it’s cold and / or raining outside, stay inside. Being British, there’s a high chance of it being cold and / or raining outside. Or – in more recent years during July and August – like sprinting into a forest fire covered in petrol. Why am I banging in about coats? Well, Watney Heckbulb Uhhhnn make coats. Or rather are ‘coat developers’. So there you go.

The logo you might be familiar with if you’re into coats, backpacks, hiking or, I dunno, luggage? Camping paraphernalia and shit. It’s like Millets. If Millets still exists. Do we do ‘hiking’ in Britain? I always thought it was a US way of saying ‘walking’. Maybe it’s walking with a bit more of a treacherous edge. What with the nearest things we get to a mountain or a ravine here are a mild gradient and a minor pothole respectively.

On the show, Collaterlie Sisters mentions during her Businews report that Watney Heckbulb Uhhhnn are forced to cease trading due to bad burping. Which sounds absolutely mental in its own right but isn’t anywhere close to being the oddest thing to come from her mouth. Chris Morris seems to have a serious problem with her over the course of the series and we never really find out why.

Alas, we probably never will.