Factvert Visionics USA

Look at this little guy. He’s using my gynasium womb implant to exercise so his mom loses weight.

We’re back at Brass Eye HQ and we’re bashing the Americans again. Factvert Visionics USA are up on screen for a matter of seconds, having produced an infomercial (‘fact’ and ‘advert’ being a suitably predictable portmanteau) for Dr. Balb Kubrox’s internal gym system for foetuses. Well, his title is ‘Gynaethetic Expert and Inventor of Uterobics’, so it makes sense. Helping him along the way is the feature’s host – the excellently-named Accelerata Jengold. The parts are portrayed by Hugh Dennis and Doon Mackichan respectively and the bit is almost like a sister accompaniment to The Day Today’s report on the Natus Institute (being as they both deal with the yet to be born and both feature Mackichan). It’s all in the ‘Science’ episode, so see if you can find it.

Now, I had a very clear idea of where I wanted to go with this one. Basically those shitty, dated animated company logos you’d get at the start of VHS tapes back 1n the 80s / early 90s. Viacom, Touchstone Pictures, Orion, that kind of thing. Whilst doing my research, I realised that there were absolutely millions of them, so it was kind of anythings goes, really. The one I went for is one called IPC Video and I can’t even find a logo on Google Images for that. So this is up there with the most obscure things I’ve ever done. Which is saying something. If you ilke the idea of almost two hours of those animations, I can highly recommend watching this. IPC Video is in there, so see if you can find that as well.

I realise I’m getting you to do a lot of work for this one. Though please do remember that tracing all of this back to its origin is advisory and not mandatory, so don’t think I’ll be testing you on anything if you give me money.